Onto the complaining:
I should have ended up waiting in one of three spots at the library. I did not. Partly my fault.
My ride, the maternal unit, came in looking for me. She binged up and down the two levels twice or thrice and asked for paging help from the allegedly nice lady at the circulation desk. Said lady went 'Rrraw rraw rraw we don't page unless it's for a medical emergency'. A suggestion was made for my mother to go look in the children's section. Which frustrated my mother, as the employee assumed she was the type of person to abandon a child. (Also, my mom is the Gramma cliche). Worry ensued, because (A) she's a mother and they do that and (B) I do get nasty headaches. Maybe it -was- a medical emergency.
Back up the elevator, to talk to the folks in non-fiction. The nice employees at non-fiction were perfectly happy to page whoever the heck my mom wanted. I appeared out of the non-fiction stack seconds before I was paged. Hurray!
Back down at checkout, we were going to use the self-checkout to avoid the lady. But I had a book reserved. I might have even skipped it, but it was something my mom wanted to read to. I caught the eye of a guy working there and he checked us out. But the Fucker rumbled up and went 'Rrraw rraw I guess you didn't find him rraww rraww' and my mom replied with 'Beyotch, shut your face, he's right here' (okay, not really but the intent was in her words). Dumb Employee rumbled about the stick up her butt and walked off. I think the poor guy was shocked that his colleague was such a weirdo. At least I hope so.
P.S. Stick In The Butt lady is the same person who ignored my complaints that the library's elevator was making strange, new noises. Fortunately an email to her bosses got the situation looked into. I was promised that the elevator would be checked out and it stopped making the bad noises. I was also told that I could use the staff elevator if need be (see: headaches, stairs are sometimes impossible).