Then the oil light came on.
Well, crap, there's no where for me to pull over since there's major construction on the highway and the shoulder is closed. The next exit is a few miles away and so I attempt to make it that far. At just about the exit my car starts making some very unhealthy noises. I make it about a third of the way up the ramp and my car dies entirely. Screw me.
So I manage to get the car onto the small shoulder area and I pop the hood and take a look.
I check the dipstick, nothing there.
I have some oil in the back of my car so I go get it and pour some in, three seconds later all of the oil pours out of the bottom of my car.
Fuck, now I'm really pissed.
My wife has the cellphone and there's no place within a mile with a phone. I attempt to flag someone down and 25 minutes or so later someone was nice enough to stop and call my wife, who came to pick me up. Now she works about an hour away from where I was, so I was standing outside in the freezing cold for an hour and a half. I didn't want to sit in the car because of how everyone coming around the curve on the off ramp was riding the shoulder. I saw several older people have to swerve at the last minute to avoid my car, which was all the way over the white line onto the shoulder, so there's no way I'm waiting in the car.
My wife gets there and I call Jiffy lube. They say they'll send someone out to see what the problem is. I am no mechanic but I know the car is shot to hell so I tell them to send a tow truck. Nuh-uh, they'll fix it up they say.
So now I wait another half hour for the fine folks at Jiffy Lube to show up. At least this time I can sit in my wife's car and not freeze my ass off.
The two Jiffy Lube employees get there and take a look. Well, look at that, they forgot to put the oil plug back in after they changed my oil. The employees make an attempt to start my car after putting a plug in and adding three quarts of oil. The engine makes several strong attempts to leap out of the car while making the noise of hundreds of fingernails scraping across a chalkboard. Fabulous.
Now what I find interesting is that when my wife and I get back to the Jiffy Lube there's no big puddle of oil in front of the Jiffy Lube. My car was sitting there running for a few minutes while I paid so I didn't lose all of my oil there. My wife and I take the same route I did earlier and there's no oil trail anywhere along the way.
Basically, not only did Jiffy Lube not put the oil plug back in but I have a very strong suspicion that the mechanic didn't even put new oil in after he drained the original oil out. GOOD TIMES. The fact that my car made it five miles before giving up the ghost is a miracle unto itself.
Basically where we stand now is Jiffy Lube is taking care of replacing my engine. My wife and I were supposed to leave on our trip this next Tuesday but I was told that there was no way the engine is going to get fixed before the 13th. Our apartment lease runs out on the 10th along with all of our utilities being shut off.
Add in to this fun little equation that the manager of the Jiffy Lube had the balls to complain to me that the whole situation was really tough on him. I'd sure like to have some sympathy for you chief but you DESTROYED MY CAR and utterly screwed me over. I'm sure the situation has been tough on him, but to complain to me about it? The hell? When I talked to your area manager I even made it a point that I wasn't interested in getting anyone fired.
I just talked to the area manager a few minutes ago. He informed me that the manager and the mechanic from the station had both been fired. When I reiterated that I didn't want someone fired just because of me he told me that a lot of things had been going wrong at that particular Jiffy Lube and this was the final straw.