I finally got a call back about what happened with my daughter. I wasn't able to go down there in person. It's an independent lab like Quest, not connected to a hospital or specific doctor's office. First I got a call back from a general supervisor and then another woman who I believe is her boss, who transferred me to her boss, the lab manager/director. It seems like they have a lot of managers and managers managing them on top of it. The woman who drew my daughter's blood wasn't a registered nurse but a phlebotomist, and not even one who works for them specifically, but a floater. The director apologized and told me that they had lost several people in one week and everyone was running around trying to cover the gaps. Director apologized for J's attitude regardless. The specific disciplinary action against J was confidential but I was told there had been a meeting between her, her supervisor and their supervisor and there would be a staff meeting about "clients with special needs". She assured me J was no longer working with children. She couldn't refund our copay though. I tried, but I guess it was a bridge too far.
FWIW, my daughter was very upset at first, not so much over the poking but because she's incredibly self critical and constantly blames herself for things that are nobody's fault. I read her some of your responses and she seemed to feel better. She was relieved that there are other people who hate needles as much as she does, she offered the other needle phobics a collective fist bump. Thank you for all the advice on blood draws! We went to Quest a few days later and we were able to get it done, even though she wasn't very happy about it at first. Hannah has anti-anxiety meds but we try not to use them unless she really needs it...she was so panicky that I gave her a dose before the appointment (usually we do it after) and it helped a lot. We'll probably give her a low dose before every blood draw from now on, it seemed to make it infinitely easier. Thank you again!