This particular station is located just outside of the plaza where I work - my particular place of employment has had people go to great lengths to break in (and we have nothing valuable), and there have been armed holdups at other businesses here within the past year or so. We run into some weird things when closing at night, sometimes. So, needless to say, there's already a bit of reputation to this area.
Anyway, a couple of weeks ago I walk into this gas station and get in line to pay with my mother. As we're stepping forward to be served, a man bursts in through the doors followed by two others, struts up behind us and grabs his crotch before throwing his hands in the air (I don't know how else to describe it, really. Soooo WEIRD.) He leaves one hand up and the other goes down for a pocket while he yells, "Everybody, GET DOWN NOW!" The other two men each spread out in opposite directions.
My heart stops. This is it. I'm finally going to be in one of these places while it's getting held up.
I reach for my phone in my purse and start to turn when I hear, "HAHAHA! Don't worry, that's just my son!! Hey boooyyy how's it hangin'?!" FROM THE CASHIER. The guy laughs and walks up to the counter and high fives/hand shakes the cashier while she laughs and laughs. I'm sure I look as freaked out as everyone else there did, because we all looked at each other with some very clear whiskey-tango-foxtrot expressions as our hearts resumed beating/sank back down from our throats.
The cashier makes no effort to diffuse the nerves, nor does she apologize for his behavior. She even stops ringing us up to chit chat with him for a minute, before hollering, "Get your a** out of here boy before I whoop it! See ya later!" She smiles and laughs at us and tells us, "Don't worry! He's my son!"
Yeah, your son who is very lucky that nobody had 1) a weapon or 2) was a cop when he and you thought it would be HILARIOUS to joke about holding up the store. My sides are splitting. Really. I really got the vibe that he wasn't her son, so I don't know why she felt the need to cover for him. Ughghghgh.
Edit: I should also mention, this cashier is a regular at MY job which is why I didn't say anything at the time. It is also why I doubt this guy was her son - I know a lot about her and children have never been mentioned...