It usually takes a lot to get me riled up, but several things happened in succession that made the evening that much worse.
My brother had just finished his Masters' in Education and we went to Tulalip Resort and Casino, quite a ways away, to celebrate. They have really good food, good prices (lunch goes until 3pm, and supposed to be about $13 We were there about .) and a wide range of cuisine but we don't come here often, so when we do, it's a treat.
We get in line to pay and I notice that their usual price board (the one that says 'Lunch Until X', 'Tuesday: Seafood Night' etc) is missing. In its place is one that says 'Father's Day: 9am-10pm, Adults 21.95' . There isn't anything that says 'Lunch' or anything like that, so I assume that they must be having their Father's Day special today and tomorrow (as places sometimes do). To expedite the process I have out $25 to hand to the woman so I don't have to hunt for cash and get in a little quicker.
I hand her my money and she doesn't say how much it is, or how much I gave her. I hear her mumble something but she gives me back the correct change if the buffet was really $21.95.
A little apprehensive, I take a step away and wait for my sister (right behind me) to pay.
Lady: That's $12.97
My sister hands her $15.
I speak up.
Me: I'm sorry, but I think I got back the wrong change.
Me: I gave you $25.
Lady: No you didn't.
I point to the sign (she and I can both see it)
Me: The sign says it's $21.95. I gave you $25.
Lady: Well I don't have a twenty in the till.
Me: Yes you do. You never told me how much it was; I just gave you the money. Your usual sign isn't out there, it just says 'Father's Day, $21.95. I gave you $25 to cover that.
Lady: (shoves open the till, looks at her money, and finally gives me a ten) Well fine. I'm trusting you. (She gives me a sharp look) You're not lying, are you?
(Later, at the table, I look at my receipt and realize that she never even rang in how much I gave her. She rang it as if I gave her exact change. So now I wonder if she even looked at my money when I gave it to her.)
Everyone pays (my sister, my brother, my mother and myself) and we get seated...right next to the entrance to the dishwasher, so we can clearly smell sanitizer and bleach. Now, normally, I wouldn't mind. The restaurant is full. There are only so many seats. But the seats closest to the door were so close I was afraid I'd hit a waitstaff rushing out the door every time I pulled it out. And my sister and I are allergic to most commercial cleaners, so the smells were giving us headaches. Not enough to ask to be moved (there wasn't anywhere else to go, anyway) but enough to put a damper on our good mood.
Mom says she'll wait and place the drink order so the rest of us go get food. We come back, about five minutes later. Mom says the waiter hasn't come by yet and leaves to get food herself.
Five minutes after that the waitress finally comes. We give our order (two coffees, two hot teas and four waters).
15 minutes after that, after Mom has come back and brother has already gotten seconds, the waitress finally appears...with the tea and coffee. But not water...
Waitress: (laughs) Ok, lets see! Two coffees and two lemons, right?
Mom: Do you mean tea?
Waitress: Right (laughs). Tea. With lemon on top!
Mom: Yes, that's us.
Waitress: Well you can see I don't have your waters. I only have two hands, after all. (laughs) Now if I could only figure out how to balance a plate on top of my head!
She leaves, and doesn't say anything else to us. No 'I'll be right back with your waters' or 'Just a sec' or anything like that. Instead she goes over to two other (larger) tables and asks for their drinks, then disappears into the kitchen.
We wait another seven minutes before she comes back with our waters. But she doesn't take the plates away. In fact, throughout the rest of the hour we spent there, she never takes a plate away. They always sit there until some other waiter comes along and asks if we're done with them.
We also don't get any more water for the entire hour. This is despite the fact that two of our glasses were clearly empty and sitting at the edge of the table, and once someone asked if we wanted more coffee, but disappeared after we said 'no' (and before we could add, 'Hey, can we get some more water?')
The waitress comes back once. Actually she comes back twice. Once to drop off the toothpicks, Wet Wipes and tip plate (again, without saying a word) and one last time to ask if we want more coffee (never mind the empty water glasses and empty plates!)
Before we can even say 'No thanks, but how about some water?' she launches into a conversation that I'm sure I'll never forget.
(Note: Throughout this whole conversation, we were never able to get more than a word in edgewise. She talked that fast)
Waitress: (stares and my sister and I) Oh, are you twins?
Waitress: (claps hands together) I just had twins! My daughter and her husband, they just had twins! A boy and a girl, unfortunately, Oh, I really wanted girls, but you know, so long as they're healthy and the mother's ok! How much did you weigh?
Waitress: (turns to mom) How much did they weigh? Were they a good twin weight?
Mom: ...5 or so pounds?
Waitress: Mine were 6.1 and 6 pounds even! Oh! And they were born a day apart from each other. A million in one chance! One was conceived on a Friday, and the other on a Saturday, if you know what I mean! It's super rare!
And then she leaves. We sit there for a minute, wondering if she really just said what we think she said.
It's then we decide that we're definitely taking advantage of their Customer Comment cards, because even if the rest of the evening was sub-par for them, that conversation was completely uncalled for. And kind of disgusting.
But the comment card is conveniently missing. And we realize that not only did she not introduce herself, she wasn't wearing a name-tag. So we have no idea who she is or who to tell, only that my brother (who loves people-watching) noticed that she spent far more time at her other tables then she ever did with us.
We give her a half tip after we make sure that it's split up amongst all of them. If we had known it would all go to her, we wouldn't have tipped her at all.
TL;DR: Waitstaff is sucky, Cashier is sucky, and Waitress is W.T.F