There a lot of things that count as news and are worthy of front page coverage: politics, the economy, crime, environmental disasters, etc. Heck, I'll even grant you sports.
An upcoming episode of South Park? Not by any stretch of the imagination.
ETA:Apparently, expecting non-fluff news on the front of a newspaper is the minority opinion on this com. *shrug* Oh well, I'll just depart from the thread with a "YOU KIDS GET THE HELL OFF MY LAWN!!
BTW, could the tagger add the "I dare you to say Hastur three times" tag? Not related, but I like that one.
Edit:To correct embarrassing typo.