Want to know one of the worst things you can say so someone almost five months pregnant, while attempting to do their ultrasound?
"Huh. I don't see a baby anywhere in there."
Had she been further along I'm pretty sure the panic would have had her popping the kid out right onto the tech's lap.
(Thankfully it was just the ultrasound tech being a fucking moron. She pulled in one of her co-workers who gave her the 'omfg are you really that stupid?' stink eye and had absolutely no trouble pointing out the baby. -_-)