Thanks for all the advice on my last post. You all are the best.
Someone called again today for her. Script format for ease:
CR: Collections rep
Me: *waves again*
Me: No. This is not Kathleen. Kathleen used to own this house. I bought THE HOUSE from her last January.
CR: Do you have a new number for her?
Me: No. This is not, and never has been, her phone number. Could I speak to a supervisor, please? I've been getting calls like this for her for some time, and I'd like to get this cleared up with a supervisor.
CR: I've never spoken with you before. No one in my company has ever called you.
Me: How do you know? (Yes, I admit I had to go all Customers_suck on her at this point, simply because she pissed me off.) Do you have the call sheets for all of your coworkers? I'd know for sure if someone in your company had called me, but no one who calls will tell me their name or what company they're with. Put me through to a supervisor. NOW.
My husband and I have decided to solve this problem by canceling the phone service. The only calls we get on it are these calls for Kathleen, people who want my vote (Sen. Durbin's campaign called 17 times last election season. SEVENTEEN. Is that really necessary?) and wrong numbers. I've informed anyone who needs to call here that they should use my husband's and my cell numbers rather than the home phone. I've unplugged the phone, since I can't figure out how to turn the ringer off. I'll be calling Comcast on Monday morning. (That's a whole other b_s, since I tried to cancel the stupid phone months ago, and the rep kept insisting that I'd need it for "emergencies" and refused to cut it off.)
Maybe I should have told them to look her up on Facebook and harrass her there. It took me all of 5 seconds to find her there.