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February 8th, 2012

Bad and/or Confusing Service

My mother died on January 20th. The husband and I flew down from Canada on the 21st, as I am her next-of-kin and thus needed to do all sorts of stuff. My grandparents, who live in the same city my mother did, had already set some things up with the funeral home, though they couldn't do much until I got there.

Monday, January 23rd we all went to the funeral home to discuss things. We informed them that we'd like her to be cremated and that I'll be flying back to Canada with her remains. After we filled out all the required paperwork we were told that they had to get a permit from the state to do the cremation, and that they would have the permit by the 24th or 25th, after which they would cremate her as soon as they could, since they had a couple people in line ahead of her. They thought she would be cremated by the 27th.

We called them on the 27th, not having heard anything. They told us things would be ready by the 31st, and that we would have her remains at that point. We called them again on the 1st of February, since we hadn't heard. We this time we were told the remains would be ready on February 3rd, the Friday. No phone call. We called them on Monday the 6th, and were told they would figure things out and let us know later that day. No phone call. We called again today, calling the boss of the fellow we've been dealing with, who said he would find out what was going on and call us back around 1pm. No phone call.

Now, we are in the middle of our third week in the States. I got one week of leave from work due to death in the family. One week will be covered by advancing me the entire year's worth of sick days at once. The third week will not be covered. I cannot afford more time in the States, and even if I could, we've been given three different dates for when her remains would be ready, and now it seems like they're avoiding us entirely. I can't fly home without her remains, and at this point I have no idea when we'll be home. Which, in addition to annoying my job, isn't helping how homesick we are. Plus, we just want the closure of having her remains, in hopes that then it will feel a bit more real that she's gone.

I guess our next step is to go there in person (for which we have to rely on my grandparents, who have paid for the cremation, because neither myself nor the husband can drive), and see if that gets any more answers.

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