Let me explain something before i start though. I have some scarring on my arms that stand out quite brilliantly. Nothing short of surgery will ever fix this. I am slowly learning to live with said scars and cope as well as I can. But sometimes when people ask me what happened, I can't help but be unusually cruel. Especially when they make a show of it.
I love nosey people. I really do. Especially when I'm on the ball and looking for someone to harass for their stupidity. Case in point.
*Scene is at K-Mart. We're checking out, chubby little checker happily checking our items out. My mother and two children are with me, as well as a store crowded with holiday shoppers.*
*Cashier spotting the scars on my arms* Oh my god! Did you get into poison ivy or something?! *This of course being loud enough to be heard up at the service desk..some six cashier stalls down*
*Me looking up confused for a moment then look at my arms.* Oh no.. not from poison ivy.
*Mom looking rather embarassed FOR me looks like she's about to speak*
*The cashier gasps again and of course speaks loudy* NOT from Poison Ivy!? What's wrong with your arms!?
*By now I'm getting annoyed, yet amused, because here I am formulating an idea* No, not from poison Ivy.. I was bitten by tiny little insects.. from a place called NOYGDB.
*mom Looks at me perplexed and confused*
*Girl stares at me* Where's that?
*Me* Its a magical land..its short for None of your god damn business.
*Cashier resumes checking us out.. without another effing word*
Something tells me that she embarassed herself more than she embarassed me.