Note: There are a few good souls working at Circuit City with whom I have had good experience. But these mouth breathers were anything but.
So, 3 weeks ago I took my laptop back to Circuit City because the wireless hardware was fucked. They played around with it, apologized for the obvious problem, and shipped it out to be fixed under the warrantee, swearing it would be less than 2 weeks.
Today I finally heard from them. (It'll be 3 weeks tomorrow.) But, undaunted, I excitedly ran down to the store to pick up my laptop after class this evening. I wait for 5 minutes by the help desk while several employees stared vacantly at my eager countenance, laptop bag and paperwork in hand. Finally someone came over to help me, and I handed over the paperwork.
Me - "Here to get my laptop, heard it's all set."
Vacant Employee - "You got a call?"
Me - "...yes. I got the recorded message that it was fixed and you had it."
Other Vacant Employee - "Cool. What kind of computer? I'll go get it."
Me - "Err, I gave her the paperwork there with the id info. It's a HP laptop."
OVE - "Cool." *trundles off to fetch the laptop from a backroom*
VE is meanwhile printing out a form for me to sign, and hands me a pen. The form is to prove that I actually got my computer back fixed.
Me - "I'd like to actually check it out and make sure it was fixed before I sign this. I don't distrust you, but you know how these things are all legal and binding."
VE - "Just sign it, he's getting it."
OVE appears with a plastic bag containing a laptop, and I eagerly reach for it and slide it out. Right off, I notice dents, scratches, and wear marks on the top.
Me - "Um, are you sure this is mine? Mine was brand new, and this is scratched up and nicked."
OVE - "Yeah, it's yours, see?" He points to a sticker on top with my name on it. What a fucking genuis this fella is.
VE - "Yeah, well, that's not our fault. You'll have to talk to a manager about that." re: the scratches
Me - "Fine, I'd like to do that. Let me see if it's working. You have a wireless network here, right?" I open it up and power it on without waiting for an answer, because when I brought it in, the tech guy tested my wireless by searching for a wireless network. He said they had two. The login screen is NOT mine, nor is it blank - it has 4 different user names, which basically boil down to Mom, Dad, Sissy, and Junior.
Me - "This isn't my laptop."
OVE - "Yes it is." Again with the pointing to the sticker.
VE - "It was wiped. It might look different. And I don't think we have a wireless network." Very patronizing. Yeah. Like your 17 year old skank ass is completely up on computer issues. You look like you have problems stocking DVDs you vacant bitch.
Me - "Well, your tech guy tested this for me on the floor and claimed you have several wireless networks in here. Crap! This isn't wiped. This has someone else's stuff on it." I turn the screen around so they can see the 4 different logins.
OVE - "It's yours." For the third time, he points to the sticker and shrugs. Look, sonny, I see the goddamn sticker. I'm going to feed you the sticker in a minute.
Me - "Fine. Want to get that manager, please?" I click on one of the logins just in case this is some weird demonstration thing and look at the desktop. Tons of random shit. I throw my hands up.
Computer Floor Guy - "What's the problem?"
Me - "This isn't my computer. If it is my computer, something was really botched with this fix, it was damaged en route, and your tech guy lied to me about your wireless network and would have had no way to figure out what was wrong with the damn thing before sending it out."
CFG - "What's your last name?"
Me - "Lindsley." Finally. Someone's going to look this up for me, right? RIGHT?
CFG - "Nope, this is yours." And he points to the motherfucking sticker.
Me, growling, notices something. The sticker on the keyboard area. The sticker that identifies the laptop's chipset as an Intel 4. "Look, this CAN NOT be my computer, because my computer has an AMD chipset, and this thing is an Intel."
OVE - "But this is what we got back with your name on it." And he shrugs.
Me, nearly hyperventilating. "The someone fucked up, because my laptop has an AMD processor and this thing is an INTEL! It's got a ton of virus shit floating around on it that I didn't download, is scratched up on the top and bottom AND screen, and has 4 different logins even though only one person ever used it, that person being me."
Smiling Manager approaches. "Aren't Intels better chips than AMDs anyway?"
Me, eyeballs bulging. "I. Just. Want. My. Computer. Back. This. Is. Not. My. Computer."
SM finally notices that I'm about to physically damage one of his employees, and sends OVE and CFG off before I pick up the not-mine laptop and beat them with it. "Okay. There must have been a mix up."
Me - "Um, yeah. That's what I've been saying for some time now."
SM then walks VE through resubmitting paperwork to try to track down my laptop. He mentions, "We'll ship this back out tomorrow."
Me - "Look, I really don't give a rat's ass what you do with this laptop. What I want to know is where *my* laptop is, and if it was given to the family that owned this one, I want a new one back, because they've treated this one like shit. It's covered in scratches and marks and has tons of crap downloaded on it that is unhealthy because apparently this machine was owned by a family with a lot of kids who mauled it to death. So, if anyone other than me or one of your techs so much as laid a finger on it, I want a new machine, because mine WAS new, and any hint of damage to it would be your fault."
SM looks a little scared of me at this point. I feel good. He stammers something about agreeing with me. I gloat.
Me - "So, you'll be contacting me tomorrow when you find out where MY laptop is?"
SM - "Yes. You'll hear from us tomorrow, and the techs no later than Saturday. We'll have it FedEx'd, expedited delivery if at all possible."
Me - "I think you'll find a way to make it possible."
SM - "Yeah. Yeah."
Me - "Thanks."
Update: This occured Thursday evening. Though I was promised specifically a call today, I have recieved no call from Circuit City, either the local place or the repair center.
It's official - I will never again buy a computer from an electronics store. Next time, I don't care how long it takes, I'm building my own, or sexing up/cooking for one of my technology-savvy friends in return for their services.