Everything got hooked up and installed quickly. We got the self-installation package rather than paying Qwest $150 or so just to come out and hook up our computers. Everything worked great, we like the satellite tv, everything was fine. Until I get an email telling me the first bill is available online.
The first bill, for $212.00.
Obviously, I had myself a little heart attack when I saw that number, and immediately went to the website to look at my itemized bill. I need to register for My Account access. Okay. Only in order to register, I need a 3 digit code that's on my paper bill. The paper bill I don't have, because I signed up for paperless billing when I opened the account. So I call their customer service number. The woman I talked to said that she couldnt' tell me anything about the account unless I had the 3 digit code. So I explained *again* that I don't have the 3 digit code because it was never given to me, and I have paperless billing. After going back and forth on this a couple of times, I finally convince her to send me a paper copy of my bill. She said it would arrive in the mail in 5-8 business days.
2 weeks and a couple more identical phone calls later, I finally get something in the mail with the elusive 3 digit code on it. It's a disconnect notice. They're going to shut off our service if I don't pay them $212, but they still won't tell me *why* I owe them $212. The disconnect notice isn't itemized. It just says I owe them $117 for the land line (buh-wha?), $35 for the DSL, $50 for the tv, and $65 for "other fees". Which doesn't even add up to the $212 that they say is my total bill. And in what alternate universe does a basic land line with no long distance and no extra services, which we used maybe twice since we've had it for less than 10 minutes, cost $117 a month?
So, now that I have the magic code, I go online to register for online account access so I can see exactly why they think I owe them all this money. Nope, sorry, not that easy. I go through the whole registration process, choose my username and password, follow all the steps, and finally get to a screen where it tells me to log in to my newly created account.
Nope, sorry, the username and password that I just created 2 minutes before don't match. Resetting the password doesn't work, because the username and email address I just gave it don't match. So I decided to try their online chat with a customer service agent. The system connects quickly, and in seconds, I'm chatting with Jenny. This is how the conversation went:
Jenny: *blah, blah, canned greeting* How can I help you today?
Me: I'm having trouble registering for My Account access. I just tried to register, followed all the steps, but when I try to log in I get an error message saying that my username and password don't match. When I clicked the link to reset my password, it said my username and email address don't match, either, and it won't reset. What can I do?
Jenny: I'm sorry, our login system is currently having issues. Please try again later.
Me: Okay, maybe you can answer my real question in the meantime. I just got my first bill, and the amount is more than twice what it should have been, but I'm on paperless billing, so I don't have an itemized bill to see why the amount is so high
Me: Can you tell me why I'm being charged so much more than the amount I was quoted when I signed up?
**This chat session has been disconnected**
Yep, she hung up on me while I was in the middle of asking her a question. So, well and truly pissed off by this time, I call the customer service 800 number. After spending a good 10 minutes talking to one of those damn voice recognition comuter systems, I finally get to tell the stupid computer that I want to talk to a customer serivce manager. I get put on hold by the computer, and a few seconds later it comes back to tell me that normally it would transfer me, but the call center is currently closed, and there is no one to take my call. Then it hung up on me.
Of course, their call center is only open when I'm at work, and unable to make personal calls. So tonight I get to rush home and try to get someone on the phone before they close. I can't even begin to tell you how excited I am about that.